“The Bachelorette” Episode 1 Recap: Who Put a Ring on It?

“The Bachelorette” is back! And we have your Bachelorette episode 1 recap right here.

We all fell in love with Rachel Lindsay a few months ago when she was on Nick Viall’s season and went all the way to the semi-finals. We didn’t stay heartbroken too long when she didn’t get one of the two final roses because by then the news that she was going to be the next Bachelorette had already been announced.

She was back in the mansion on Monday—with the most diverse group of suitors yet. So let’s get right into our Bachelorette episode 1 recap!

The Good:

Vinny’s insights

Remember “Jersey Shore“? Well, our favorite cast member Vinny is also a member of Bachelor Nation! He is literally all of us when we watch “The Bachelorette.”

Our front runners

The Bachelorette Peter

Peter is a 31-year-old business owner from Madison, WI, which is where Lindsay went to law school! He’s also super sweet and he/Lindsay have the same teeth. Love it!

The Bachelorette Josiah

Josiah is a 28-year-old prosecuting attorney from Ft. Lauderdale, FL. He’s just one of 96,000 Floridians this season, but we’ll get to that later. His personal story about his younger brother, his troubled past, and the steps he made to become a new person resonated the most with us. He’s definitely top 5 in our book.

The Bachelorette DeMario

DeMario is a 30-year-old an executive recruiter from Century City, CA and frankly a hottie. He met Rachel a few months ago during the live “After the Final Rose” ceremony and left quite an impression with her. We’re hoping that he makes it far this season!

The Bachelorette Kenny

Lastly, we have Kenny, a 35-year-old professional wrestler from Las Vegas, NV. He definitely seems to be one of the more mature men this season, and not only because he has a daughter. He made an impact in our opinion, so we are interested in seeing how he plans to woo Rachel.

The Bad:

The men

Sweet, Mohit. He’s a 26-year-old product manager from Pacifica, CA who got way too drunk on the first night. But his reactions did make for some pretty meme-able moments!

Adam, a 27-year-old real estate agent from Dallas, TX, wasn’t a problem. But his creepy puppet Adam, Jr. certainly was. Trust us when we say ventriloquist dummies are not sexy. They’re just nightmare inducing.

We had SO much hope in Blake K., a 29-year-old U.S. Marine veteran from San Francisco, CA who told Rachel an amazing story of how his grandparents married after just a few months of knowing one another, only to now be celebrating 60 years of marriage. We know. We’re crying, too. Why did you let him go, Rachel?!

What the Florida?

Lastly, there are too many men Florida to bode well for the season. We’re from Miami, so we can say this.

The Ugly:

What is a whaboom?

A 30-year-old man by the name of Lucas from Santa Monica, CA. It’s also something we hope we don’t have to deal with for much longer. Unfortunately, he’s still a suitor for Rachel’s heart. It’s pretty obvious why he’s in the Bachelor mansion. **cough to be famous cough**

The elephant in the room

So the same Kenny listed in our front runners reportedly had something… questionable written in his “The Bachelorette” bio. Just take a look for yourself. The question he was answering was: “What’s the wildest thing you’ve done in the bedroom?” He may have been a little too honest for our liking.

A post shared by Paco is my nickname (@pacozero) on

Let’s stop discussing male virility

Blake E. is a 31-year-old an aspiring drummer (yup, you read that right) from Marina del Rey, CA. He also felt the need to discuss his penis, his sex life, and overall skills in the lovemaking department with all of America. How about you make your big Bachelorette debut by discussing something else, no?

Consent is sexy. And necessary.

Bryan is a 37-year-old chiropractor from Miami, FL (we told you!) and winner of the first impression rose. What bugs us about Bryan, however, is that he pretty aggressively planted an unexpected kiss on Rachel during the first night in the house. She said it herself that she didn’t plan on kissing anyone that night, but still enjoyed their encounter.

Maybe it’s not black and white here, but this is an example of why some guys think no or silence means yes. What do you think?

The Future:

Rachel recently revealed that she’s already engaged so let’s watch closely to see might’ve out a ring on it. All in all, we’re excited to get into the season, get to know the guys, and see Rachel in all her Rachel-ness for the next few months. Come along for the ride!

We’ll be live-tweeting all our feelings and posting re-caps each week. Thanks for reading our Bachelorette episode 1 recap.

Until next Monday!

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